That was the question I asked.
This mother's response was not short and I cannot write it out word-for-word, but it was wise, gentle, true, and exactly what I needed to hear.
Here's the gist (with a few of my thoughts) --
We all have baggage from our parents. None of us wants to pass on our own baggage to our kids; we don't want them to have the same mess we have. But, even if we try to prevent from passing on similar baggage, our kids are still going to end up with baggage from us the parents. It may look or seem different, but it is still baggage.
At the end of the day, it all comes down to God's grace. You wake up, you fail, and you make messes. Then, you must do two things: give it all (efforts and failings) to God and repent (to God and to your family -- so your kids can see confession and forgiveness in action).
This parenting gig’s an experiment in radical grace and the work of every parent is to fully give to the child. And it’s the work of every child to fully forgive the parents. ~ Ann VoskampSo no matter what, my kids are going to have baggage from me. Because I am frail and weak and human. Yet, I have received and still receive the grace of God. This I can give to them, too.
Although I am less than the least of all the Lord’s people, this grace was given me... ~ Ephesians 3:8