Don't you ever just get so fed up with yourself? I sure do. I feel like I always say the wrong thing or do what I set myself against doing or don't do what I promised I would start doing. Arrrgh! I frustrate myself to no end.I was commenting to Ricky about my intense frustration, depressing disappointment, with myself. How I cannot do what I want to do. I have all these lofty goals and even plans to carry them out. Yet, I fall and fail until I just weep tears of angst and frustration. And it hit me. Once again. But, I'm dense.
"Maybe it's good to be disappointed with myself." It just shows my humanity -- my extreme weakness. I cannot do this. I cannot do any good thing on my own. I am needy and have all the more reason to cling to Jesus. I am a woman of death in need of Him who lifts me up out of the pit and walks with me and helps me and breathes life and purpose into me. He can do this.
For that reason, I am glad to be disappointed with myself.
What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body that is subject to death? Thanks be to God, who delivers me through Jesus Christ our Lord! ~ Romans 7:24-5
