Sunday, July 8, 2012

Drawing Near

All week. It's been this --

I roll into view, into the main room. "NO! Mommy," Aolani screams and points at me to go back where I came from. "Daddy."

Translation: "Mommy, don't come any closer! Get out and stay away! Daddy is here with me, and I want him."

It permeated everything. Pushing me away from the baby, the washer, the table... I can wipe you, get you water, put yours socks on... No, Daddy [do it].

The first few times this happened, I was shocked. Hurt? Yes. But mostly shocked. I'd try to just shrug it off.

But, by day two... I was crying in the bathroom. All I could hear ringing in my head was, "Don't get near me!"

And then, this still, small whisper. "Come near Me."

Breathe deep. Close my eyes. And there He is. With His arms open wide. Waiting, just waiting. For me to run headlong into His embrace and feel His welcoming warmth surround me as He holds me tight and draws me close.

My dirt, my sickness, my shame, my bad attitude, my self-pity doesn't thwart His unwavering gaze and beckoning call one bit.

My own flesh and blood may not want me to come near, but my Redeemer does.

And that is enough.
Come near to God and he will come near to you. ~ James 4:8
Let the one who is thirsty come. ~ Revelation 22:17 
Come to Me, all you who are weary and burdened. ~ Matthew 11:28.